Beginning the healing journey after experiencing trauma can be overwhelming. I know what that is like. I know what it is like to be in a dark place, to feel alone and as if no one gets what you are going through. I have been there myself! Above is a picture of me on the left during one of my darkest times. I was in a toxic relationship, and we were both unhealthy. But, thank God, I went on a healing journey & came out much stronger.
Admitted My Powerlessness & Need for Help
Admitting powerlessness can be very difficult but must happen for any healing to begin. This step requires honesty and courage to admit the truth over what we do not have control over and accept the need for help.
I will never forget the moment I had my newborn in my arms and was arguing with my then-husband. He was asking me to hold his baby girl, and I would not allow him to because I believed (based on my inner critic beliefs) that he did not want her. However, that belief was completely untrue, and he loved her with all his being. I could not see that because I was looking at him through my trauma lens. That was the moment that I knew I had to have help. I knew I was powerless over my life, and it was completely unmanageable. That day something broke inside me and I began fiercely looking for help because I did not want my own trauma placed onto my children due to my inability to face my healing journey. Thank God, He directed me to a 12-Step Codependency Group (Living Well Ministries), and my life began to change!
Trusting in God
This step is more complex than the first. In this step, I had to start believing and trusting that God could restore my sanity and help me live a healthy lifestyle. However, the ability to trust anyone is entirely crushed by trauma, making this step difficult but not impossible! All things are possible through Christ!
I had to learn this step did not require that I fully trust, just that I needed to believe that something bigger than me could actually help me. I had to have a mustard seed of faith. That is all I needed! I slowly began believing that I needed something more than myself to help me recover from my dysfunctional living.
Surrendered to God & the Process
In this step, my life slowly began changing. I surrendered my life to God and the process and asked for help. This was where I started showing up in therapy and working on myself outside of treatment. I began reading self-help books, journaling, and doing everything my therapist suggested for me to do to get healthy. I stopped relying on my old patterns and surrendered to the process of healing. I accepted help from others and help from God. I read daily devotions and His Word. I began to do the hard work it took to recover because I no longer wanted to stay stuck. I wanted freedom, and I wanted it so badly that I began doing the work. My life slowly began changing, and my life continues to change today.
These three steps can help you begin changing and making healthy life choices. You truly can heal. It takes time and takes all three of these steps. Once you commit to change, hold on because it will be a bumpy ride but will be so worth it!
Did you enjoy this blog? I hope so! You will also want to grab my FREE 6 steps to healing after toxic relationships. You can grab it here: 6 Steps to Healing after Toxic Relationships.
Here is my TikTok for a bit of visualization of how God transformed my life! Connect with me there and on my social media platforms!